m_findlow

Title: On the bright side
Fandom: Torchwood
Characters: Jack, Ianto, Torchwood team
Author: m_findlow
Rating: PG
Length: 2,591 words
Content notes: none
Author notes: Written for m_findlow's prompt "Any, any, chatty" at fic_promptly
Summary: Things are looking up, just like they always do before they're about to come crashing down

Jack stood there, feeling proud as he watched the team milling around together, eating pizza and laughing. His team. Somehow, he managed to get something to right in putting these people together into a single functioning unit. It had its ups and downs, and it hadn't always been easy, but he wouldn't have traded those four people for anyone else.

And there, right in the middle of the group, was Ianto. His Ianto. Somehow he'd gone from invisible helping hand, to the heart and soul of the team. It made Jack feel warm and fuzzy inside just thinking about how much he adored the man, and how everything had changed for the better ever since the first day they'd met. No, he wouldn't change that for anything.

Watching them, he noticed that Ianto truly had become the centre of attention, laughing and joking, telling some kind of story which had the others in rapturous laughter. Probably something about him, but he didn't mind. They had no secrets from the rest of the team. If Ianto didn't tell outlandish stories about their adventures, Jack would have been doing so in his place. Knowing how happy he made Jack, he wanted to make sure everyone else knew it too.

Ianto had grown into an amazing person, finding a confidence that he hadn't realised he had, and watching him now, Jack saw just how far he'd come. Still reserved and quiet when it mattered, but no longer afraid to speak his mind. Jack couldn't wish for anything more. Everything at this particular point in time was just perfect.

It wasn't until several days later, that Jack noticed just how good things were. Ianto was remarkably upbeat, not even getting annoyed at Owen when he made an absolute mess of the SUV, having conveniently forgotten to clean up after hauling several very dead, but very messy aliens back to the hub. Jack waited for the man to go ballistic, ready to step in between them to prevent world war three, but it never eventuated. Instead, Ianto picked up his bucket of prepared cleaning equipment and followed Owen back to the SUV, chatting amiably with him about what his plans were for his first anniversary with Tosh.

'Did that just happen?' Gwen asked him, doing a double take as she watched them.

'I have no idea,' Jack said, equally confused. 'He didn't even blink when I left crumbs in the bed this morning. I put it down to good mood, but that's just, well, weird.'

The next few days brought more of the same cheery, unflappable disposition. Nothing was too much of an imposition for Ianto. Jack would've have considered it odd, except for the fact that the rest of the team seemed to catch some of that infectious positivity, and Jack was capitalising on the most amazing lovemaking either of them had ever had.

One other thing that seemed more out of place than his unnaturally sunny outlook on life was the level of conversation. Ianto, who even at the best of times only spoke when it was strictly necessary, or to deliver a well timed dry remark, had become unstoppable in his desire to strike up conversation. Jack didn't think he'd heard Ianto talk so much in the past three months as he had in the past week. There was nothing untoward about it, he was just suddenly taking an interest in what everyone was doing, what their plans were for the weekend, what did they think about the mayor's new proposal for redeveloping the city centre, and the like. All harmless, trivial chit chat.

Finally, the day Jack had been dreading came around. Once a month, he had an obligatory phone call with John Frobisher from the Home Office. He hated those calls with a passion. Civil servants had no interest in the good work they were doing to protect the planet, and wanted to stymy their efforts at every possible point. It drove Jack to distraction having to put up with these pointless conversations which never got them anywhere, and usually ended with one of them hanging up on the other.

Ianto was chatting with Tosh when Jack stuck his head out of his office.

'Ianto, much as I hate to say it, can you please get Frobisher on the line?'

Ianto smiled and nodded. At least that made Jack feel good, even if what came next wouldn't.

He sat in his office waiting for the inevitable phone to ring, with Ianto announcing that he had him on the line, and he sipped his coffee while he waited.

After about ten minutes of waiting, he wondered what was taking so long. Perhaps Bridget was stonewalling them, or pretending that their scheduled phone call would need to be rescheduled. He could only hope.

When it seemed like nothing was happening, he stuck his head out of his office again and saw Ianto on the phone, chatting and laughing.

'She actually knitted a jumper for her cat? Oh, that is too much!' he said, laughing.

'Ianto, what's the hold up? I thought you were getting Frobisher on the line for me.'

Ianto almost seemed to ignore Jack, still having his chat with whoever was on the other end of the line. He finally looked up and saw Jack waiting there impatiently.

'Okay, well you'd better put him through now, Bridget.'

Bridget? Bridget Spears? Jack thought, confounded. Since when were they best pals? Usually she was the ice queen. The day was just getting weirder and weirder. He'd check her file later for any usual activity that might signal she'd been taken over by aliens.

As the day wore on, Jack began noticing more and more Ianto's change in demeanor. Two weeks ago he'd seemed a bit down and out, and now it was like he was on top of the world. Jack wondered what it could be that had him so bright, or at least brighter than usual.

He didn't have to wait long to ask him, seeing him approaching across the hub, carrying a stack of files toward his office. He was about to say something, but Ianto got in first.

'Hey, did you want to go see a movie tonight? I hear there’s this great film showing at the Lido. It’s all black and white and set in the 1950’s. And no subtitles. I know how much you hate subtitles.'

'Ianto,'

'Maybe we could go for dinner afterwards?'

'Ianto,'

'There’s this great little Spanish place just opened up by the bay and they have these-'

'Ianto! Stop talking!'

Ianto looked surprised, and a little affronted.

'You need to lay off the coffee.'

'I haven’t had any. I could get you some, if you wanted. I have some of that special Jamaica blend left. I’ve got chocolate biscuits too. I’ve been hiding them from Owen and-'

'Ianto, stop.'

'What?'

'Ianto what's going on with you? Almost overnight you've become the team socialite. I don't think you've shut up for more than ten minutes all day.'

'Are you saying I can't be in a good mood?'

'No, of course not. I just can't help but wonder where this is coming from. You're not usually so chatty. In fact, you're not chatty at all.'

Ianto dropped the files on Jack's desk. 'Well, maybe I'd like to change that. Is that such a bad thing?' He was getting upset now.

'Look, I'm not saying that, it's just, argh!' Jack growled. 'All I'm saying is that I'd love to know what's made you decide to change all of a sudden.'

'Nothing!' Ianto cried. 'I thought you'd be happy!'

Jack didn't really want to have an argument. Things had been good and he was happy, he just wanted to understand why things had turned a complete one eighty. Belaboring the point only seemed to be making things worse.

He placed a weary hand on his hip. 'Look, just forget I said anything. Maybe I'm just tired.' He wasn't tired, but it seemed like a good excuse to use.

'Fine. I will,' Ianto said, turning on his heel and leaving.

Good one, Jack, he thought ruefully.

Ianto stormed though his front door, still annoyed with Jack. He stood in the hallway, reaching into his pocket and turning the small metal cube over in his hand a few times. He must have been really angry with Jack, because it wasn't making him feel any better. He walked into the living room and slumped on the sofa, pulling it from his pocket and dropping it on the coffee table in front of him, staring at it.

He'd pilfered it from the secure archives two weeks ago, assured that no one would know it was missing. Jack never bothered to access the logs and left Ianto in charge of all things archival. It probably wasn't the best idea, he admitted, since the one person he'd trusted to ensure the safety of items in secure storage was the one who'd gone and betrayed that trust.

It was the only time he'd ever thieved anything, at least since he'd been a teenager. A quick sleight of hand and it had been in his pocket, unbeknownst to anyone. The longer he stared at it, the more guilty and miserable he felt. He leaned forward, picking it back up and clutching it. He must have sat there for at least an hour and still holding it, and didn't make him feel any better. The only thing that was going to ease his conscience now was returning to the hub to confess what he'd done.

He half expected Jack not to be there; off sulking after their brief argument. Part of him would have been glad for it, but the bigger half would have been disappointed not to be able to come here and clear the air. At least that was what he was hoping for.

Jack was in his office, working through a pile of reports. Funny how you had to beg, borrow and steal to get him to do them normally, but now left to his own devices he was happily ploughing through them.

Without a word, Ianto slowly walked up to Jack's desk and placed the small cube on it. Jack looked up from his paperwork, spying the object and looking at it for a long while.

Well, that explained a lot, Jack thought. The cube had fallen through the rift a few months ago. It had the usual property of making anyone who carried it deliriously happy. Owen and Gwen had been high on life, going out and painting the town red before anyone understood properly what the device was capable of. It had the potential to make a person completely reckless with their new found joie de vivre. Jack had only touched it for a few minutes and felt how it made him feel totally invincible, which luckily for him, he already was. He supposed that it was his naturally outgoing personality that made the device act in such an extreme way. Owen and Gwen were hardly wallflowers either, leading to their eccentric and wild behaviour. For someone reserved like Ianto, the effects had obviously been much more subdued, yet still noticeable, had any of them thought to look for the warning signs. Suddenly everything made sense. The sociable attitude, the chattiness, the overly rosy outlook on life. Only one question remained.

'Why?'

'I just wanted to feel happy.'

'You're not happy?' Jack said, surprised.

'I'm not unhappy. I just got tired of feeling like this.'

'Like what?'

'Like everyone else has it easy. Nothing ever seems like a chore for you, or Owen or Gwen.'

Jack cocked his head at the man standing on the other side of the desk. He could sense there was more to this. Ianto was impossible to understand at the best of times, highly intelligent and infuriatingly complicated, and yet Jack was fascinated by the challenge he presented.

'What made you decide to take it?'

Ianto couldn't meet Jack's gaze. It was bad enough that he'd done what he had, but now for Jack to not even be mad at him, only made it worse. In for a penny, in for a pound, he decided. Time to come clean.

'My sister.'

Jack looked confused. 'Your sister?'

'She wanted me to go with her to lay flowers at the cemetery. I made an excuse not to go and she went right off. Told me I was the worst son anyone had ever had. Then she wanted to know why I wasn't with Lisa anymore, and what I'd done to make her leave.' Jack watched as he began nervously wringing his hands. 'I couldn't take it anymore. Every day I watch you all going about your day, without a care in the world. I just wanted to know what that felt like. Being happy and carefree.'

Jack leaned forward. 'You think life's easy for anyone? You ought to try walking a mile in my shoes.'

Ianto just sat there, feeling even more miserable than before he'd stolen the device.

'If you were feeling low, you should have come and talked to me. I don't want to think you're wandering around waiting for the world to cave in on your head.'

He reached out across the desk for Ianto's hand.

'Actually, I thought we were doing okay.'

Ianto looked up and met his gaze for the first time.

'You mean when I was happy?'

'Before that, actually,' Jack replied. 'I won't deny that the sex was pretty spectacular of late,' which received a small smirk from Ianto despite himself, 'but I'd rather know that the reason you're happy is not because of some alien gadget, but because you're happy being here; being with me. '

'I am happy being with you,' Ianto assured him. 'I just thought you might like me better if I was more like everyone else.'

Jack just shook his head. 'Ianto, if you were like everyone else, you wouldn't be you. You wouldn't be the person I want to be with.'

Jack picked up the cube, feeling that immediate rush of endorphins, as if the world were suddenly three shades brighter. He could understand why Ianto might have found it a temporary relief from all the turmoil he seemed to be going through.

'You are a good person Ianto Jones, and your family love you no matter what hurtful things they might sometimes say in the heat of the moment. If you wait for everyone else's approval for you to be happy, then trust me, you never will be.'

Ianto wanted to sink into the floor. He'd made such a mess of things, again. When was he ever going to get things right?

Jack's telepathy kicked in again. 'Forget your sister for the moment. She'll get over it.'

'You don't know my sister.'

'I know you. Apples don't fall far from the tree. Instead, why don't we spend tonight making you happy the old fashioned way?'

'I don't feel much like being cheered up. I think I've done enough damage in that department.' In all honesty, he wanted to go straight back home and curl up under the duvet for about a month before he thought he'd be able to face Jack again.

'That's a shame,' Jack said. 'I hear there's this great movie on at the Lido tonight. Black and white. 1950’s.'

Ianto managed a small smile. 'Best part is there's no subtitles.'

'No, the best part is getting to watch it with you.'